When you want to stop overeating, and are looking at possible strategies, consider these words, “progress not perfection”. Perfection, is impossible, so you may as well ditch that strategy as quickly as you can.
Perfectionism also drives overeating and other addictive, self-soothing behaviors- I would venture to say that every single one of my overweight or bulimic clients is a big-time perfectionist. Their perspective makes life hellish. They feel never-good-enough, try to do it all, get little or no pleasure or satisfaction out of any of it, and feel so drained from all of the efforting and stress that they…. start eating in ways that make them hate themselves more.
Much better to focus on movement towards your goals. Set gentle intentions that don’t leave you feeling like a massive failure when you are unable to meet them. Never set a goal that you cannot absolutely meet- if you make them small and bite-sized, you will feel encouraged, confident, and most importantly you will keep moving forward.
Perfectionistic goals are often punishing, impossible, intensify your negative self-beliefs, and are so overwhelming that you give up. Nothing good comes of this- trust me. I am an old perfectionist from way back, and I continue to have to modify these tendencies.
Life is no fun as a perfectionist- that perspective really does suck the life out of you and everyone and everything around you- it’s like wearing the Red Shoes from the old fairy tale- the girl who could not stop dancing, who had to go faster and faster until she dropped from exhaustion (I think that is the end of the story- anyone remember?).
What if you just aimed for “a little bit better”? What would some kinder, gentler intentions and goals look like? They may not give you the big “hit” of excitement and anticipation that you get when you set huge ambitious goals, but guess what? You never reach those goals anyways- they don’t get you anywhere, they usually paralyze you with fear and dread.
Just try it my way! What are some small totally reach-able goals you could set, just for today? Even a goal like “will eat 2 servings of vegetables today” is a fabulous goal that will do you tons of good, and how totally easy is that? But if you meet that goal, and eat those spring veggies- I guarantee you will feel good about it, and you will be on your way!!
Another gorgeous sunny day here in the country- bliss.
xox
Lisa
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