Last time I got to write about “Trust” with a capital “T”… it was perfect timing.. of course, everything always is even when we don’t know it. Trusting for me is still often in retrospect. The kind of thing where I say to my husband or one of my closest friends that I really wish I had known it would turn out so well so I could have spared myself (and my favorite most generous loving friends and family who dole out the witnessing and support and listen and reflect back and just stay present for it all, even when I am spinning a bit.. or a lot)… what I say to them and myself is “I wish I could have known this would unfold so just-right so I could have skipped the angst, the sleepless nights, the energy of worry and fear and loss that sweep over me in those dark moments.”
I wish.
And the truth is I do know, at a very deep but not always accessible level that it will all turn out. I am not one of those people that believes that they will end up on the streets. I have a lot of faith.. a lot of trust. And yet the fears will still nip at my heels and run me around. And if I had one wish for myself I think it would be that the trust would be bigger, more accessible in each moment and that the fear would leave my body, be erased from all my neural pathways, that any residual fear-memories would go “poof”. As the losses in my life have increased in number, some of the traumas added up over the years (deaths, fires, illnesses..accidents, losses) I have felt them more keenly in my body. It can be really uncomfortable and it can disorient me, but not for too long.
I still believe I am protected, guided, loved. I do still trust in some way that lets me start again, or to find the support, the friendships, the fun, the new pursuits.. that will enliven me again. I trust that I can tell the truth, be seen and heard with love, and do what I am here to do. I trust that I am a creator that can adapt. I trust that my heart will find ways to stay open and love more. I trust my body and I trust my IntuitiveBody (my guidance). I trust Divine Order and the Divine. I honestly thank God for all of this.
Sometimes I believe that having walked through a fair amount of pain, as we all do, as most of us will, is where we truly learn to trust. We are still here. We are often wiser. We have more to draw from and remember.. each time we come through the fire.. even if it’s just a little one. And I think most of us learn we can’t do it alone, nothing good can come from that. Heart open, even when we are more vulnerable, even if people are not nice, even when we screw up and have to live with it.. softening my heart lets me trust.. myself and the way of the world.
Trusting is a good thing. The alternative.. not so much.
I am in the midst of many new changes. Exciting changes.. big deal changes. Game changers that are calling on me to come into a place of trusting what is real, what is essential, what is mine to do and be in the world. It’s so right, right now. And it doesn’t look like what I thought it would, which says a lot about trust I think.
I’d love to know where you are willing to trust.. and where maybe not so much..Do you have a connection to your Intuitive Body and does that make a difference? Leave me a comment below.
With love from my heart to yours..
Also.. when you trust yourself and know that you are ready to move into a new season of your life.. to get the support to take your longings for change and coming into a new beautiful expression of yourself.. email me! Lisa at IntuitiveBody dot com.. or check out my new program here!
Leave a Reply