Welcome to the Wise Woman Council November 2012.

I’ve been thinking so much recently about the wisdom of our (intuitive)bodies.. the knowing and guidance that lives there. I remember my well-loved spiritual/clairvoyant teacher that I studied with for many years whose favorite saying to our class was “get back in your body”. What she meant was to get out of our heads, get out of our intellectual way of trying to understand things, and let the knowing of our intuitive feminine receptive guidance point the way.

It’s so easy to get disconnected, and for most of us it happens countless times in a single day. I try to remember to pull my energies in again, to gently and with as little judgment as possible “come home to my body”…to settle in, to breathe and slow it all down until I am rooted again..It’s inevitable that soon enough something else will pull me out. I will get distracted by what’s “out there” in some way, or by my own fears and self-judgment and the swirl in my own mind..and lose my footing, my center and have to repeat the process over and over. It’s part of our nature.

As we move into the shorter days, we are called to move inward. To pull our energies inward and begin to slow down a bit. As always, the pieces shared by this month’s Wise Women offer you many ways to soothe and nourish yourself at every level. See which ones call to you and try leaving your busy mind behind for a bit each day.. come home to your body and the beauty and peace that you can find there.

With great thanks to all of the women who contributed this month.. so much wisdom and beauty here.. and to everyone who is here to fill their well. I send you much love and every blessing.

With love from my heart to yours..

What’s one act of loving care that you do for yourself each day, and how does it fill you up ..with peace, gratitude, and beauty?

Jennifer Boire

I admit it – sometimes I don’t take good care of myself, but I’m learning. Menopause was my teacher. I have never had a daily beauty ritual, don’t use face creams or special cleansers, except for sun protection. And I’m terrible at getting enough exercise, except for weekly yoga and walking my dog after lunch. But sitting and going inside very morning does fill my well with stillness.

I have always had a morning meditation practice, ever since before marriage, before kids. Although when I had two babies twenty months apart, it didn’t happen very regularly. Now that the kids are studying away from home, I have the luxury of getting myself a leisurely breakfast at 6:30 or 7:00 am, with freshly made café au lait, hot frothy milk and espresso coffee, gluten-free toast with almond butter, peanut butter or cream cheese (Boursin with garlic and herbs is so yummy). Then, after skimming the paper for any articles of interest to women, I head back upstairs, still in my jammies, throw a soft shawl around my shoulders and sit on the bed for my morning practice (an hour is optimal). It may take a while for my mind to slow down, but as my teacher Prem Rawat says, just let the thoughts pass like clouds. I listen to the silence of the heart….accompanied by my two companions, a shitzu-bichon, Mollie, and a gi-normous white cat with black spots, Oreo.

To top it up, once a week, I make myself a mini-retreat. I light a candle on my little altar, put on some soothing yoga music, do a few stretches or lie in corpse pose, then when I feel centered, I get out the Angel Cards or Medicine Cards (to get in touch with my intuition) and write in my journal. This precious ritual has become necessary at least once a week. If I don’t get some down time to write in my journal every few days, I get cranky and irritable. Sometimes I forget that all I really need is some time alone to write down my thoughts/feelings. It’s my greatest self-care secret. If I stay in touch with the ‘undercover me’, and dialogue with my higher self (something I learned from Janet Conner’s book Writing down your soul), I am much happier and content. I always have a pile of books on my bedside table, so often I will read a poem or a quote – maybe something from Mary Oliver – that starts me writing or thinking. Journaling and SoulCollage®, making my own divination cards out of magazine images, are both very soul nurturing. Accessing my inner wisdom or intuition is the wisest thing I do for myself. And it basically helped me survive a rocky menopause, and gave me something to do on those sleepless nights. That’s long gone, now, at age 58. But I encourage you to find a practice that soothes you, rocks your soul, and makes you feel whole again.

It’s Dawning on Me

If we do everything else but that one thing, we will be lost.

And if we do nothing else but that one thing,

we will have lived a glorious life. Rumi

In my solitary quest

for a silent Sunday morning

free of phones and idle chatter

and hungry for connection,

I watch the hazy sky at dawn.

Then seek the bronze/gold sun

My inner sunrise,

under the rich cashmere shawl

of breath.

Where thoughts are thrown back

into the lake like fish

too small to keep.

I am after bigger fish,

the One Voice that purrs

and picks me up, kitten

in its mouth.

Held by the wide Mothercomfort,

awe in the face of such deep

nourishment, a seed

reawakens– the passion

for living inside-out.

From For the Birds, 2011

Jennifer Boire is a published author, with two books of poems and the recently published guide and workbook for mid-life women, The Tao of Turning Fifty, What Every Woman in Her Forties Needs to Know. In her Musemother blog, she writes about finding balance amidst the turbulence of the mid-life journey, and she has just released a Musemother Relaxation CD. She leads creative journaling writing workshops for women as well as day-long retreats. Her goal is to help women connect with themselves, hear their own inner voice, and nurture a soulful connection with their creative Spirit. www.jenniferboire.com, on Facebook and Twitter as Musemother. Free excerpt of The Tao of Turning Fifty on her website.

Jessica Covington

Some days I have to drag myself to it, other days I leap out of bed ready for it — and every time I finish, I feel peaceful, powerful, and purposeful. My workout is the keystone of my day. The form it takes changes daily, but it always works best in the early morning. I wake up at or before 5:00, have a cup of coffee, get my head on straight and shake out the thoughts that came to me overnight. Then I’m ready: a run, kettlebells, body-weight circuits, or power yoga get my day really started. I have to clear my head of everything else in order to keep good form and to breathe properly. To feel my muscles getting stronger with every step, every swing, every lift or pose reminds me that I have choices. Every thought, every action moves me either forward or backward — making so many forward choices within a workout sets my daily momentum in the right direction.

My other mini-ritual for self care is to practice gratitude — oddly enough, in the shower! It sounds funny, but I can count on getting a shower (pretty much) every day so it’s a great cue to remember how grateful I am for so much goodness in my life. I count things big and small — everything from the joy of indoor plumbing to the bliss of having healthy, happy children.

When I’ve got these two practices going strong, I’m able to open my heart to the world and serve with a purpose.

I’m a late-blooming multitasker: well into my mid-thirties, I started a family and two businesses within the same year! My current work, www.ClickAClass.com, connects busy folks to fun, discounted fitness and propels health-related businesses by handling some of their back-office duties and by getting them in front of their target markets.

Jen Loudon

My central act of daily loving care is practicing acceptance – being aware of my thoughts and patterns, my aches and pains, my judgments and fears, and saying hi you are here. Being welcoming and loving to all of me and all of my experiences, without letting any of it define me, without letting any of it run my day. Rejecting myself, my moment-by-moment lived experience is no longer something I participate in. I am a holy yes of acceptance, and by practicing acceptance, I choose my life with so much more ease and well, choice!

Of course, I fail at this often, usually before I’ve had my morning tea. But then I get to notice and accept that, too. It’s an always widening circle of more self-love.

Yes, I also meditate, practice yoga, go for long walks in the wood with the doodle dogs. I journal, read poetry, pray and make art messes. But all of those become icky shoulds wrapped around my ankles, hobbling my creative life force, without this balm of acceptance.

I hope you will join me in saying yes to your experience and by doing so, find that love that is always available.

Jen Louden is a personal growth pioneer who helped launch the self-care movement with her first book The Woman’s Comfort Book. She’s the author of 5 additional books on well-being and whole living, including The Life Organizer, that have inspired more than a million women in 9 languages. Jen has spoken around the world on self-care, written a national magazine column, and even sat on Oprah’s couch talking about the power of retreats. She believes self-love + world-love = wholeness for all. Visit http://JenniferLouden.com for fab free goodies and upcoming retreat schedule.

Tara Mohr

One of the most meaningful and centering rituals in my life is writing down what I’ve eaten at the end of the day.

Now, bear with me for a moment, because I know many women have practiced this as a way of punishing, controlling, or judging themselves. Or they’ve done it as a way to track restriction dieting.

I am surprised as anyone that this ritual has come to be one of the most peaceful and nurturing things I do.

Why? Well, I tend to go unconscious around what I put in my body – that’s my history, that’s my pattern. I can eat to take the edge of stress, to replace uncertainty with an overfull numbness.

For me, the practice of writing is a practice of bringing into the light of consciousness what is really happening. It keeps my go-to shadow coping mechanism out of the shadows, and in the light.

Here’s how it works for me. At the end of the day, when I getting ready for bed, I simply write down what I’ve eaten each day. I also write down how much sleep I got the night before, how much I moved during the day, anything I did for my physical health (acupuncture, massage, etc.) as well as the sources of joy, or the lack of joy, I experienced during the day. It’s my way of tracking self-care. It’s my way of seeing why I can expect to feel like crap or end up leaning on extra food certain days (low sleep, low joy, low movement, will lead to that!)

But most importantly, the act of tracking, of not going unconscious, causes me to take better care of myself. It makes a difference. And even more important than that, when I’m curled up in bed peacefully writing all this down, I feel the sweet sense of calm and safety that comes from being a woman who knows she cares for herself.

Tara Sophia Mohr is an expert on women’s wellbeing and leadership. A coach, writer and teacher, she is the creator of the global Playing Big leadership program for women. Visit here to get Tara’s free guide, the 10 Rules for Brilliant Women Workbook.

Bridget Pilloud

I find that the best thing for me is to ride my bike.

Moving my body, out in the elements, connects me to the rhythms of nature, and rain or shine, I need that.

As I write this, fresh from this morning’s ride, my fingers are still a little numb and my cheeks are pink and my brain feels like it’s snapping!

I’m ready to do my good work!

Bridget is a professional intuitive, a practicing human and a life-shifter. Find her at http://www.intuitivebridge.com

Rebecca Prien

I chant my spiritual name, Rama Devi, every morning as part of my meditation. It has already changed my life.

Rama Devi is Sanskrit, and the name was a gift from my Guru (master spiritual teacher of my yoga lineage). For those of you unfamiliar with it, Sanskrit is a vibrational language. The words have no meaning except for the vibration of the sound. It is also a manifesting language; you chant to change the vibration of yourself and that to which prayer is directed. The universe as vibration makes total sense to me—perhaps ironically to both my feminine experiential side and my masculine needs-scientific-evidence brain.

In the tradition of yoga, a Sanskrit name is your highest vibration in this lifetime—a glimpse of your path. I was given my name 5 years ago, and I have practiced mantra (or japa) as part of prayer & meditation for at least that long, but I had never chanted my own name until recently. Instead, I chanted to a deity, to ask for help, but also because it felt egotistical to chant my own name. Now I chant my own name every morning, with curiosity about whom I would be and what I would create for my life, if I embodied the vibration Rama Devi.

The practice has made me fearless in being honest with myself about my needs & desires and in being seen and setting boundaries lovingly with those in my life. I am so grateful.

One woman with whom I shared this practice and transformation said, “May we all be brave and wise enough to chant our own names.” And I want to say, YES, that is my wish for all of us.

Rebecca Prien is an experienced attorney, a creative soul and a committed yogi, who has spent 11 years practicing law, 11 ½ years practicing yoga and her entire life creating things. She owns Counsel to Creativity, where she helps creative entrepreneurs protect their brands, content and profits. This Fall, she is launching Ompreneur, where she will teach the yoga of entrepreneurship. She lives in Atlanta, GA with her fiancé, Carson and dog, Maddie. You can find her at www.counseltocreativity.com and see a glimpse of what’s coming at www.ompreneur.com.

Grace Quantock

The one act of loving care I give to myself each day is to listen. It is as simple and complex as that. I come to my altar in the mornings and I listen. If prayer is talking to the Divine, then meditation is listening and being still is allowing the conversation to unfold. When I leave the altar I take that communication with me, knowing that I am part of that altar, a living expression of the Universe.

As I move through my day I give my body and my self what it needs. I crave routine and the way it creates a space to launch my dreams from. We have created a routine which serves our household but it moves daily and seasonally according to our needs. This can express through yoga, green juice and smoothie, gardening, resting, reading novels, spending time with loved ones, or getting over excited about a wonderful project. I relegated the disabilities to the footnotes of my life and I live my own adventure story by listening to where my heart pulls and dances. Listening allows me to laugh, to love and serve and this more than anything fills me up with peace, gratitude and beauty.

I used to imagine that one day I would be able to do all the brilliant things I read outlined in people’s daily routines. Now I have listened enough to myself (and my common sense) to know that it is impossible to do everything, and not desirable. Even if I am very very good and do everything I am ‘supposed’ to do, healing, smiles and ignited spirits come from listening to what is inside. I let go of expectations and pray to the Divine that lives in the mountains, that slips through the rivers and resides deep inside my own sweet heart.

Grace Quantock is a former Sick Chick turned healing Trail Blazer. She is an award winning international wellness expert, writer and founder of Healing Boxes CIC. Grace lives in Wales, Britain with her husband, their rescue dog, and an altar in nearly every room! www.gracequantock.com

Leah Shapiro

Treating yourself to loving care is such a luscious activity and is guaranteed to open up the way for the juicy goodness to flow in! The one thing that I do consistently is my morning practice of listening deeply, compassionately and lovingly to what my inner dialogue is saying and The Daily Yum. Doing this allows me to identify what I need to feel luscious and loved and perfectly sets the stage for an amazing day.

My morning practice usually comes in the form of a morning brain dump into my journal and some simple energy clearing using a pendulum. I sit with my morning coffee and ask myself I how I feel, what I need and what my intentions are for the day. I write out everything that is in my head. If I’m upset I give myself permission to rant, bitch and complain till I’m feeling complete. Then I ask myself what would feel better to me. I break out the pendulum and do some clearing if need be.

Then I move onto my Daily Yum: what I’m appreciating about my world and most importantly, about myself. I go into as much detail as possible; feeling the juicy goodness of it all. From this place I lay out a plan for my day. Setting the stage this way keeps me in alignment and feeling luscious all day. If I did nothing else, I would find time for the Daily Yum. This simple practice lays the perfect energetic foundation for my day and sends a strong signal to the Universe saying “More Juicy Goodness, please!”

I’m a fun loving, tattooed, freak flag flying mermaid who loves to entertain, play with my kitties and build my empire.

I believe the Universe is conspiring WITH you at all times and life is meant to be luscious and I KNOW firsthand that loving and accepting all of who you are leads to a Luscious Life. As a Life Activator /Kick-Ass Catalyst, I hand you a permission slip to drop society’s expectations for you and go after what you REALLY want in life. Come and get your permission slip today! http://leahshapiro.com/come-and-get-your-permission-slip/

Ashley Solomon

There are no birds chirping when I rise; no sunlight peeking in through the nearly translucent curtains in my bedroom. It’s what I call the brutal time of year – the one where the morning has gobbled up all the light, holding on to it for a few more precious moments before releasing it back to us. I stumble out of bed, splashing cool water of my bare face to wash away the last remnants of sleep.

If you had asked me years ago whether I would consider rising before the sun, I would have asked you for whose funeral. Severe crises were the only potential excuses for such behavior, and I relished every moment of sleep I could claim. So the ten-year-ago me would be surprised – okay, horrified – to learn that the now me chooses this practice on a regular basis.

I haven’t learned to love the darkness or the crusty pieces of sleep in my eyes. I’ve learned to love moving my body in the morning.

Each day, I’ve committed to moving my body in a way that makes me feel alive. The old version of myself would have assumed that the only possible explanation (since funerals and crises had been ruled out) was that I wanted to lose weight. Why else would I ever consider torturing myself with moon-lit runs or achy vinyasa flows?

The real reason is because engaging with my body each morning fills me with a sense of connection that I’d never previously experienced. After years of anger, bitterness, and distrust of my personal vessel, mindful movement has given me the gift of gratitude towards myself.

When I was able to shift my focus from the aesthetic to the instrumental, my sense of myself entirely changed. My body became not just an ornament, but a vital component of my being. For me, this shift came initially through my first experience with yoga a little more than ten years ago. I had worked out here and there, mostly running on a treadmill, watching Designing Women reruns at the gym. And suddenly there was this practice introduced to me that challenged me to just begin to notice. My first time in yoga I cried – big, sloppy tears. It was the first time I think I had truly inhabited my body, and it was terrifying.

Years later, movement of all kinds can give me that experience. And rather than fearing the feeling of taking up space and connecting with my physical being, I embrace it. It makes me feel whole, and it makes me feel powerful. More than anything, it makes me feel grateful.

And now, I’m excited to be awake, to have the opportunity to meet myself again each morning. The sun will meet me when she’s ready.

Ashley Solomon, Psy.D is a clinical psychologist, chocolate connoisseur, soon-to-be mother, and author of Nourishing the Soul. NTS offers a forum for exploration around individuals’ relationships with food, body, and self.

Susan Thomas

When I read Lisa’s invitation to be a part of the November Wise Women Council, my immediate thought was, I can’t do this. I don’t have any daily self-care habits.

Oh sure, there are plenty of things I aspire to do every day for myself, like starting each morning with a few gentle stretches and five minutes of bouncing on the mini trampoline instead of heading straight to the computer, or sitting quietly with a hot cup of medicinal herbal tea, walking four miles in the woods above my farm like I used to do for years (and haven’t done for years), singing a 13-minute healing meditation, making it further than two poses into the 45-minute home yoga practice video I started back in May (and haven’t even looked at in months), doing 10 minutes of special yoga stretches to save my shoulders and arms from too much computer time, writing in my gratitude journal (or at least finding my gratitude journal), sipping fresh lemon water throughout the day. . .

Nope, I’m one of the women in the second paragraph of the invitation, the ones who are spinning, depleted, or a bit frustrated and need inspiration.

And then I thought about it some more. And I realized I do have some daily self-care rituals that keep me grounded, sane, and awash in gratitude and beauty—but they come so naturally that I don’t think about them. I don’t even have to think about doing them.

One is hugging and snuggling my animals. Whether it’s a big black farm cat, an affectionate donkey, a 96-pound Great Pyrenees livestock guard dog, or a wooly, spoiled sheep, the effect of trading affection with these amazing creatures fills me up beyond words, and I do it throughout the day.

Another is taking deep yoga breaths. I may still not have a consistent home yoga practice going, but I now breathe more deeply and fully than I have in 20 years. I’m less anxious, and have even managed to lower my resting heart rate by 20 beats per minute, just by paying attention to my breath.

But my most important daily self-care ritual is laughing.

Years ago I read a very alarming statistic—that some huge percentage of women (like nearly all of them) do not laugh in front of men because they’re afraid of how they will sound. I was horrified, and I swore that would never be me.

I easily get embarrassed, self-conscious, or shy about a lot of things (which is part of why I do so well living in the middle of nowhere, miles from the nearest neighbor), but laughing has never been one of them. I laugh often, I laugh loudly, and I never, ever hold back. Sure, some people stare (especially if I’m indoors), but what are they going to say? I’m laughing.

My hunky farmguy and I laugh together all the time. We have tons of stupid inside jokes, and we repeat funny movie lines over and over and over. We crack up in the sheep barn, we crack up at the grocery store. There is always something to laugh about.

And you know what? It turns out that people actually like my crazy, obnoxious laugh. A friend I met at a farming conference recently (a man!) said to me afterward, “Your laugh is intoxicating.” And the other day my brother-in-law (a man!) told me that he loves when he calls and I answer the phone, because he knows I will end up laughing, and “just hearing you laugh cheers me up even after the worst day.”

I may not ever get back to walking four miles a day, or remember to sip my lemon water, but that’s okay. And not beating myself up about my self-care ‘failures’ may actually be my most important act of loving care. That or laughing about it.

Susan Thomas is a former graphic designer, bakery cafe owner, antiques dealer, and cultured California chick happily turned manure mucking Missouri farmgirl. Eighteen years, at the age of 26, ago she moved sight unseen to the middle of nowhere and has almost never looked back. She lives on a 240-acre remote farm with several dozen sheep, several dozen chickens, four dogs, four cats, seven very entertaining donkeys, and one really well fed farmguy. She shares recipes, stories, and photos from her crazy country life at FarmgirlFare.com.

Holli Thompson

My friend Lisa asked me , what’s the one thing you do daily for yourself that fills you with peace, gratitude and beauty?

As a grateful health coach with peace-loving ways, and a tag-line that says “age-less beauty through nutrition”, I jumped on the chance to tell her; I was sure it would be a breeze.

My morning greens might qualify; smoothie or juice? juice or smoothie? and then I realized that my intuitive way of eating removed my breakfast from the ritual category. Some mornings it’s chocolate in my smoothie, for a boost of energy, and other days it’s all greens. Some days I need just green juice for brain power. This fall it’s fresh pumpkin, and a craving for seasonal spices that are warming to my body.

My daily walk or run is a fabulous ritual, but wait, if I sometimes walk, and sometimes run, and I adjust the time each day to my work and the weather, does that count as a ritual? What about my Barre3 days? Or my rainy day rebounder?

I had to move on from that too.

I love my lunch ritual, when I take a break from writing, and clients, and I sit on the porch with my dogs. I enjoy a huge salad, full of live foods and I feel the misty sunshine of Virginia on my face.

But wait, many days I’m running to a seminar, or a TV studio, or Whole Foods market. On those days, I grab a green juice and a small portable cooler. Me, my car, and an Abraham Hicks CD hit the road, sipping all the way.

There is something… something I do every day without fail. I end my day with a shower ritual.

I’ve created a serene bathroom space that I love and I’ve organized every thing I need to make me feel pampered. I grab a kombucha or a cup of Calm (a warm magnesium drink) and I close the door to my sanctuary. No dogs or kitties allowed! When my son was a baby, my husband would tell him, let’s not bother Mama, it’s er private time.

I dry brush my skin using a cactus bristle brush daily (it’s a bit stiffer than a natural bristle one, and takes getting used to) and I turn on the shower.

I wash my face with my favorite organic cleanser, and I add lavender essential oil drops to the floor of the shower to infuse the steam with it’s calming qualities. I use home made goat milk soaps or an infused shower gel, and I love trying new ones all the time.

After my shower I apply coconut oil with essential oil added that I mix myself, usually lavender or possibly grapefruit for cleansing and to get rid of excess water or puff.

Some days I use the neti pot, especially if I’ve been in the city. It keeps my sinus’s clean and makes me feel like I’ve cleansed from the inside out.

I adore bathrobes, I always have, (I’ve been called a “conehead” if you’re a fan of the original SNL skits) and I have several fluffy, enveloping, organic cotton robes. I choose one according to the day, (yes, I have special-day robes and every-day robes) and I apply my facial regime of a gentle eye cream and facial oils. I like to try different holistic brands of skincare; my skin tells me immediately if it’s happy. I put on my favorite Tory flip-flops, and I begin to wind down my day.

I adore sliding into clean white cotton sheets, knowing that I’m taken care of, and that the day is washed away. I try to think only positive, loving and good thoughts at night, and I give thanks. I mentally make a list of things I’m grateful for.

I add a drop or two of lavender to my pillow every night, and to my husbands, and my sons.

We sleep well in our home.

Holli Thompson, CNHP, CHHC is a Wellness Coach and Nutrition Stylist, and founder of Nutritional Style (www.nutritionalstyle.com) Holli has been profiled in More Magazine, and featured in More’s “Reinvent Yourself” TV special. She appears on CBS, ABC and FX networks as a nutrition and food expert, and speaks to women’s groups and national organizations, including the American Heart Association. Holli writes a weekly blog, and her writing is featured regularly in The Daily Love, and Ask Miss A. She offers group programs, including her popular Cleanse with Style detox, and individual coaching by telephone and in person. Holli is co-author of the book “Optimism!” and is currently writing her own book to be published in 2013.

Check out past months

October 2012
Featuring Tracey Ceurvels, Julie Daley, Laura Gates, Pam Guyer, Marsha Hudnall, Kiva Leatherman, Meadow Linn, Rachel MacDonald, Cindy Morrison, Theresa Reed, and Deborah Weber.

September 2012

Featuring Hiro Boga, Randi Buckley, Lisa Clark, Quincy Coleman, Sammi Johnson, Brenda MacIntyre, Melanie McGhee, Amy Palko, Debbie Phillips, Megan Potter, and Bri Saussy.

August 2012

Featuring Rachel W. Cole, Alexandra Franzen, Maria Gamb, Marla Glatzel, Denise Hughes, Lisa Johnson, Tory Johnson, Erika Lyremark, Michelle Pippin, Ruth Sherman, Lisa Claudia Briggs

Go where you are celebrated – not tolerated. If they can’t see the real value of you, it’s time for a new start.

- Unknown

My Gift To You – Beauty of Relief [DOWNLOAD]