I’m hoping I got your attention, even if that sounded a bit bossy. Because perfect eating truly is a myth and it’s not a good one to be chasing. It’s yet one more form of perfectionism, and all or nothing nonsense that will lead to misery and probably result in the kind of eating that you’ve been trying to soften or change. Perfect anything is not a goal.
Stop…please. You really owe it to yourself to rethink this kind of thing. Anything with the word or idea of “perfect” in it.. prolongs the agony. Trust me on this.
You can’t get there, because there isn’t such a thing and if there is, it’s usually a form of disordered eating. When you start to really listen to your intuitive guidance (Intuitive Body..your body knows, your wisdom lives there, you can listen or not, but it’s SO much easier if you do!) you will know that most of that time feeding yourself well, with real food on a regular basis, is what is going to feel best. There is no big trick to this. Figure out your preferences and then translate them into some form of regularly eaten meals. I recommend simple, unless you really love and know how to cook already. If you aspire to beyond simple, take it slowly. Maybe one new recipe every week or two.
When the women I know start to really come home to their bodies, and find their reconnection with how to feed themselves in a way that feels right, that transcends the fears and beliefs of their longstanding wars with their body or ways of eating, it tends to be quirky and individual, as it should be.
When you find your way of being with food that is just-right, it will not be about perfect, it will be about comfortable, nurturing, accepting, compassionate, and allowing. I can think of other words, but those are some good ones.
For me, it is occasionally about potato chips for dinner. In the middle of all of this moving and transition, last week it was candy for lunch..at Agway (Agway.. a place I have only heard of and thought was all farm-ish, and yet had my brand of dogfood, well not “mine”, but Violet and Pansy’s.. you know what I mean.) They also had candy at the register, of course.. They call these items “impulse-buys”.. good name.. sigh.
Today it’s my favorite seasonal apples for breakfast (Macoun, the crunchiest, most tart apples that have a short season and that I love and could maybe live on). Lunch is I don’t know with my friend Susan 90-minutes away where we are meeting halfway between our homes…I am always driving in this new life it seems. Tonite, it will be dinner with Andy. Eating at our new house is very unsettled for me right now, have not quite settled into finding a new favorite market, or cooking or figuring this new piece out. But I will, slowly and with permission to let it unfold in its own time.
Our styles and preferences for eating change, by the way. What “worked” for you during one phase of your life will probably need to be revisited and revamped during another. Ditto around seasons. Or weeks that are more hormonal than others. Or during a big transition or a crisis or a loss. We are looking for fluid, flexible, and a sort of ease that comes with being able to trust yourself to listen to your intuitive voice and the messages it sends you moment by moment.
In the moment. That is where the best information and guidance come in. And if you are listening, if you are tuning in and receptive, you will get the hang of hearing and then trusting yourself to follow the simple directives. Getting over the fear, the wish to do it “perfectly”, the belief that there even IS a perfect, is part of what makes this a big deal. You can do it. Make room for it. Understand that this is a serious paradigm shift that is way easier if you make it not so serious.
I want that for you.
And of course I can help you get there, and would love to hear from you if you’re interested in how we might make that happen. I offer more customized offerings than are always on my website. Chat me up via email- Lisa at IntuitiveBody dot com.
With much love, from my heart to yours…
teryll says
Loved the post, Lisa. I’ve noticed for myself that when I steer clear of “black and white” thinking/speaking, I end up practicing more grace towards myself and my eating/cooking/movement and it seeps into other areas of my life. There is something very powerful in staying present, in the moment. Rigidity often leads to restriction and eventually bingeing, it’s a tiresome pendulum.