If you are struggling with overeating, or bingeing, you can stop.
But I must tell you that as much as you wish you could do it on your own, my experience tells me differently.
It is your addictive experience with food that keeps urging you to try to take care of things on your own.
When we are caught in addictive behaviors, those that cause us so much pain and frustration and shame, we are loath to ask for the help we truly need. I see my clients fighting this battle over and over again.
By not asking for help, you are refusing to take your needs seriously. You are not taking your pain seriously. And in doing so, you are living in a state of denial.
It’s the nature of the problem, like it or not. You may squirm at the idea of being “addicted” to anything- it may even offend you to the point of wanting to stop reading.
I can share with you that I know this place oh-so-well having been in the addiction of eating most of my life. The overeating pairs up with the belief that we can manage on our own. They are natural partners in keeping you mired in the misery of food addiction and overeating, when everything in you wants to stop. I know this place and it’s the worst.
But you have to know what you are dealing with, and what you are up against if you want any kind of relief at all. And I know in your heart you DO want relief. You are desperate to stop struggling, and to stop betraying yourself by doing the exact opposite of what you planned to- day in and day out.
Please, try to take this pain seriously if you can. Pain is always a message from our spirit that we are off the path.
Can 2009 be different for you?
Yes, but only under certain conditions. I wouldn’t write all of this if there wasn’t a way out, that would be cruel, and I would have nobody left reading my weekly newsletters.
You will have to be willing (and believe me, the operative word here is “willing”) to allow an essential shift in perspective and to invite somebody to join you on the journey.
Because it’s so easy to forget that you can’t have a “normal” relationship with food, there has to be somebody there for you to both help you hold your vision for recovery, and to be the one who takes your pain seriously when you want to return to patterns that just bring more pain.
If you only address the eating or weight loss part, you will have trouble sustaining the freedom that I know you are craving.
What you really need is an overhaul in the way you live your life. It starts with taking your pain seriously across the board- with food, with overall self-care, and definitely with relationships. This goes beyond eating, to the foundation that you have to create to support your mind and body and spirit.
To really get relief you will need to find a way of addressing all of these pieces- your issues with food are simply the way that all of this shows up!
Your pain around eating is the piece that really gets your attention, so that you can begin to pay attention to the underlying beliefs and ways of living that are keeping you feeling stuck and unhappy.
I’ve said it before- this work is not for the faint of heart. You need to be ready, you need to be willing to make big changes (with small single steps at a time) and you need major support.
If you want all of this for yourself in 2009, I have lots of ways to get you started, and if you choose, to see you through the process.
If you are truly ready for change, and can make room for the ways in which you will be asked to care for yourself, every day, then I have the most powerful and unique successful-outcome programs you will ever find.
You are worth it, you deserve it, but you have to be ready to ask for the help and admit that you can’t do this alone.
I want that for you.
Wishing you love and joy this Season-