So you probably know that I am devoted to helping women and teens move beyond overeating, holistically and intuitively. I’m really good at it- for various reasons. One of which is that I have been there and done that. And paid close attention, and brought lots of good energy-techniques and spiritual perspectives to it all. It’s a good mix, and it works.
But here’s the thing that I face over and over again, that makes this work very hard sometimes. My clients come in fairly desperate- they want more than anything to be free of the obsession, the self-loathing, the self-destructive choices and the shame. Of course, who wouldn’t?
But when real help is offered, in as many “flavors” as I can creatively conjure up (and I am really creative about all this…) most of my clients will say something like, “well, I’ll try”.
Those words make me crazy. They are words of somebody who’s lost their sense of power, who tends to feel helpless and hopeless and who is going to be wasting their money more times than not. That powerlessness is more the real issue than the eating- the eating is just the storyline that goes along with feeling so disconnected from one’s real self, the true or authentic self. You know, the one that holds the “spark of the Divine” and all that good stuff.
I can come up with good ideas and creative baby-steps til the proverbial cows come home, but that doesn’t help until you’ve answered one really essential question. And this is it-
What are you willing to do? Today, what step or small action (this is very much about action- my clients are already way too good at analyzing- they analyze things into a place of paralysis most of the time) are you willing to commit to?
This sounds like a simple question but it raises great fear and resistance. My clients don’t usually want to commit. Making commitments stirs up the wish to rebel- which is a whole other topic that’s big in overeating.
Then there’s the feelings that come up around being asked to take a small specific step- which tends to bring up all or nothing and perfectionism stuff. My clients want to do it all, get all the results quickly and tend to balk at small comfortable steps. Which is what keeps them from succeeding.
But when somebody really gets it- when somebody has the willingness to find the willingness, they get a burst of clarity and excitement. They get the experience that comes from feeling a moment of power, a moment of choosing and following through. A moment of the sense of efficacy and possibilities.
It’s really beautiful when that happens. I can feel the enormity of the shift. Just one day of willingness can birth some real momentum.
I want that for you.
Love and blessings,
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