There is something you may not have given much thought to, when you’re trying to change your weight, change your body, change your thoughts and relationship WITH your body... as you begin to move towards these kinds of efforts, is maybe the most important piece of all.
Ready? This is definitely something to consider.
I believe there is a part of you that does know it.. but keeps it slightly out of consciousness, again, because it’s a big deal.
The big reason people don’t stay the course when trying to lose weight, or stick with plans to make peace with their bodies and their eating is that to do so means to change absolutely everything. I don’t think this is an overstatement. It’s not intended to be.
But it doesn’t get talked about.
When you do what you need to do to change your body, to choose new habits that make you feel better, to ditch the ones that keep you in shame and self-hate things change.
When you begin to change your priorities, in order to make space for taking care of yourself, in ways that are essential, that keep your nervous system and body and days balanced, things are going to change.
Who you are is going to change.
As you begin to make different choices for yourself, as you become your own best advocate and learn to say “yes” to what most supports you and “no” to what you can honestly admit no longer does, you become somebody different.
Which means your relationships are also going to change. Sometimes drastically. Some people will be there for you as you disrupt the existing nature of things, and some will protest and push against, and undermine you because let’s face it, most of us are not so comfortable with change.
Women who have been struggling with body and eating issues for any length of time, very often have fears around not being loved, not keeping others happy, of being abandoned if they start to express more of who they are and what they need.
And in order to make the real changes that support living in a different body, and feeling better in that body, learning to navigate relationships differently is one of the keys to true success.
If you can’t ask for what you need from people, if you can’t create boundaries that protect you, that allow you to feel safe, and in balance, and prevent you from over-giving and people-pleasing… you will feel drained, resentful, and you will need to take the edge off with food.
So big changes, changes requiring a brave and bold heart and mind are called for during such a vulnerable time.
As your body becomes more visible, as weight disappears, you are likely to feel more vulnerable. You will be seen…maybe in ways that are uncomfortable if there are any issues around unwanted attention, trauma, or not being sure how to stay balanced when people start to look your way.
Have I mentioned competition and envy yet? Well, there can be some old fears lurking here. If you had a mother who wasn’t all that comfortable with you being a bright light. Or a sister… or friends that needed you to be the “sidekick” versus the one who attracted more attention, then coming into a different body may stir that pot and you will have to face what it feels like to be seen, to really step into all of your gifts, and how others may respond to that.
Women often use weight to hide. To not be seen. To not disrupt the power-balance. To not threaten the insecurities of others. Sometimes they use weight or feeling “not-good-enough” about their bodies and the ongoing noisy chatter of that, to put a hold on things that they wish they were doing- in relationships, professionally, and experiences that would be for fun, for pleasure, for growing into more of who they are.
There can be a lot of fear around changing all of that up.
The women I know are often bewildered when they begin to lose weight or make significant changes around the ways they do things, and suddenly revert to old ways. To change your body, your weight, your eating, and the thoughts that have been holding you hostage, for any length of time means changing a whole lot of things that you may or may not have let yourself think too much about.
Making such changes really is about leaving a specific season of your life. It involves stepping into a new identity, one that goes way beyond the size of your clothes or what food plan you follow.
As such, it’s often a good idea to know what’s ahead, what to plan for, what in your own life to be aware of... what to look at as you begin the journey so you can begin to make those shifts gently while you also make any changes to your eating or physical wellness activities.
You can’t change what you haven’t named…it will usually be the very thing that bubbles up in it’s best-dressed Saboteur clothes, to bring you back to the familiar, so that you don’t have to face some of the fears that eating or weight have kept hidden.
This is such a beautiful journey. Beautiful, soulful, brave and absolutely life-changing in ways that will ripple through in all sorts of ways. I’ve often said this is your fire-walk. And it is if you choose to move forward with it.
Every part of you becomes stronger, brighter, healthier when approached from the perspective that you are choosing to move into your just-right balance in every aspect of your life. That you are shedding any kind of weight that doesn’t serve you. That feeling lighter, more free, more clear and at ease in the world and in your own skin are of course what you want when all is said and done.
And for sure, that is what I want for you.
And here for you- with proven, powerful, proprietary techniques and 25 years of experience honing my skills to take you exactly where you most want to go. When you’re ready, or even feel like you might be, I’m here for you. Just send me an email (Lisa at IntuitiveBody dot com), let’s see where you are and how I can help in a way that’s right for you.
With love from my heart to yours…